It’s that time of year, when resolutions are being made for a brand new year!

Here is the process that I take people through to prepare them for quitting smoking. 

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS THAT YOU HAVE TO WANT TO QUIT!
Thinking you "should quit " is not the same thing as wanting to quit.  You need to change your thoughts and beliefs around smoking, what it gives you, and what it takes away. You want to build up the desire to quit, the motivation to quit and clear everything that is in the way of that. Changing habits that you are attached to is exactly as hard as you think it will be. So, think it will be easy!

TIP: Decide it will be easy. 
Don’t allow yourself to build it up in your mind that it is going to be really big and hard. 
Doing this just gives it more power over you. Instead, decide it will be easy. This is a big mind shift, I get it.  We tend to create stories in our heads about how hard it will be to give something up. 

TIP: Create a new story, one in which it will be easy for you to quit. 
If you can’t accept it will be easy, because you "know" it will be hard, be open to the possibility that it could be easy. Exactly how hard your mind fights the notion that it could be easy is revealing as to how much you have conditioned yourself to believe that it will be hard. The good news is that you can convince yourself of a new story, with just as much strength as the story in which you have convinced yourself that you can’t quit.  

Step #1- Get very clear on your reasons to quit; why you WANT to quit.
What are your reasons for wanting to quit?

• health is more important than smoking
• want to have better skin
• avoid cancer
• save money
• What else?

Lock on to whatever has meaning to you. 

Step #2- Write down all the places you currently do not smoke:

• in the house
• in the car
• at work
• around the kids
• around family

Think about how easily you have trained yourself to not smoke in those places; how naturally you abstain in those scenarios.  If you are someone that thinks about smoking all the time, and it’s always hard to have to wait to smoke, I encourage you to get some help with coaching to help unwind that craving. Hypnosis can be incredibly helpful. However most people have several places they have adapted as Non smoking places. Understand how much power you already have over smoking by looking at your list.

Step #3- Get clear on why you love smoking.
List everything you love about smoking, what it gives you, why it’s important to you.
Get REALLY clear on the reasons you smoke. This is so important. If you don't understand what it gives you, how it fills a need, then quitting is just a battle of wills. You need to dig deep here to be most effective. Be honest with yourself. You will want to change the meaning you put on smoking, how it fulfills you. You can’t do that if you don’t look at the reasons why first.


Step #4- Write down how great your life will be without smoking; the benefits you will have.
Spend some time on this step too. You want to really build this up in your mind as the desirable outcome; how great you will feel, how proud of yourself you will be. Most people I know that smoke have guilt and shame attached to smoking. Imagine life without that. Imagine how great you could feel about yourself. What other benefits do you foresee? Paint an excellent picture for yourself of all the things you could do as a non-smoker and all the benefits that would entail, especially how you will feel about yourself. 


Step #5- Build up the belief that you can do this.
Another vital step is building up the belief that you can quit. Pay attention to all the thoughts that come up as to why the belief might not feel true. What are those thoughts that tell you can’t achieve it or that you are not ready? These thoughts are important. Pay attention to all of them.
What’s coming up for you?  You need to address your doubts and build on the perception that you can do this.
Learning to control the narrative in your mind is imperative to making change. You can do it. Once you understand that the narrative is simply a story you have been telling yourself, you can change it.

When you have gone through the steps above and have a healthy desire to quit then…

Step # 6- Set a date to quit.
Pay attention to all the things going on in your mind-

• If you still have lingering doubts, write them down. Are they valid? Or are they just part of the old story telling you that you can’t do this?

 

• Is there any part of you that is not 100% sure you can follow through with the plan? What are your thoughts around this? Reinforce the belief "I CAN DO THIS".

 

• Coaching can be incredibly helpful in the quitting process and hypnosis can greatly support you quitting, once you have done this work.

Check out my New Years Resolution special if you would like help quitting anything this New Years!

Best of luck on your quitting journey!

The most important thing we can do to increase our sense of well-being and sense of satisfaction in life is to embrace self-care.

Stress is a direct result of a lack of self-care and most illness is a direct result of too much stress. We need to accept self-care as being vital to our health and well-being and not look at it as a selfish act.
True self-care will build your resilience, self-confidence, self-esteem, improve relationships, work performance and sense of satisfaction in life.

Why is it so hard to prioritize? I don't think people really understand self-care. I know I sure didn't.

Some people may think they are practicing self-care, when they are really just treating themselves, which could be having the opposite effect. Are you tricking yourself in thinking that going out for drinks with friends is self-care? You need some fun? While the social component may be very good for you, the negative effect of the drinking could be outweighing the benefit of being with friends, leaving you feeling drained. That is not self-care. Not to say that you can't go out with friends.  Just don't kid yourself that it is part of your self-care routine and that  you are doing everything you can to support yourself. Self-care might be saying no.  It's for you to decide.

What does self-care mean to you?  Does it mean a manicure or pedicure? A massage or a facial?  While those are enjoyable examples of what self-care can include, it is not a complete picture of what a total self-care routine is.  Another trap can be taking time for a pedicure, thinking you are nurturing yourself, which is good, but grabbing fast food on the fly, which is not.  Pretty toes are great and, honestly, if they make you feel good, then they do have a place in your overall personal care picture (as they do for me) but they alone will not be able to hold up a wellness plan.
Healthy eating and good nutrition is an essential foundation to a good self-care plan.
Caring for oneself should be based around things that really do support you in your health and well-being.

I love this definition:
Self-care is the collection of habits that support and strengthen your emotional and physical health and well-being.

With a good self-care plan and routine, we know what is important for ourselves. It gives us a playbook of how to stay feeling our best in all ways. It helps us set boundaries, to say no to what is not important.  It helps us create a better life/work balance because we have factored our mental health into our every day decision making process.
Embracing a great self-care plan is a the perfect place to start making changes in your life. If you are stressed out, look at your self-care.  If you are burned out, look to your self-care.

Here is what self-care means to me;  why it's important and the strategies I use.
I invite you to create your own or borrow mine to get started.

1. Self-care means knowing who you are, your values and limits.
     Why- When you know what is important and what goals you are working towards, you can more easily set boundaries.
     Strategy- Write down what you value! One of my core values is feeling good and having energy so a lot of my self-care plan is directed towards that goal. Its easy to make choices that support that goal.

2. Self-care means getting the sleep/rest you need.
     Why- Sleep is essential to waking up feeling great and full of energy.
    Strategy- For me, going to bed early works, if you are a night owl- it really means getting 7-8 hours of sleep.  Don't drink coffee and eat dinner at least 3 hours before bed.

3. Self-care means cooking healthy meals for yourself.
     Why- Eating healthily is the most important step for me feeling good.
    Strategies- Plan meals ahead for the coming week. Cook on Sundays to make the weekdays easier. On weekdays, after work,  start to cook early enough (4 p.m.) so that you have the energy and desire to cook a healthy meal.

4. Self-care means staying hydrated.
      Why- When your body works better and your skin looks better.
     Strategy- I take water with me everywhere I go and back up water in the car. I set reminders on my phone for when I get busy and forget to drink.

5. Self-care means having a morning routine.
      Why- It helps you to feel that you, not your job, are in control of your life. It creates time for yourself.
      Strategies- Get up early enough to have ample time so you aren't rushing.  This practice creates time for tea, meditation, gratitude and learning.

6. Self-care means taking time for personal growth.
      Why-  Growing is essential to feeling fulfilled and happy.
      Strategy- Set aside time every day for learning something new.

7. Self-care means feeding your soul.
     Why- Staying inspired, interested and curious are essential to feeling my best
     Strategy- look for daily inspiration in nature, art, even inspiring YouTube videos, some social media can be inspiring, but much of it is not. Be careful going there for inspiration.

8. Self-care means being mindful of what you take in visually and auditorily.
      Why- Whatever you focus on grows-  limiting negative input is important.
     Strategy- Limit your daily news intake, social media time, negativity (including negative people).

9.  Self-care means managing your thoughts.
      Why- To stay in a healthy place, mentally, don't let negative thoughts run wild in your head.
      Strategy- Stop negative thoughts when they pop up. Shift thinking to more positive thoughts.

10. Self-care means getting consistent support in growth.
      Why- Work with someone whose goal is to help you!  The benefits are amazing.
      Strategy- I am in a women's group that includes coaching.

I invite you make a list of what self-care means. Include your reasons why and the strategies you see to achieving each.  Try this out for a month.  See what a big impact a self-care plan can have!

THE MEMORY RESCUE PROGRAM-
The best way to sharpen your memory, reverse brain aging, and prevent Alzheimer’s disease and other dementia is to eliminate, prevent, or treat the 11 major risk factors that steal your mind, represented by the mnemonic (a memory device) BRIGHT MINDS.

See how many of the following BRIGHT MINDS risk factors you have.

B – Blood flow problems: hypertension or pre-hypertension, stroke, cardiovascular disease, cholesterol problems, erectile dysfunction, exercising less than twice a week
R – Retirement/Aging: risk increases with age (over 50); a lack of new learning is another important risk factor—when you stop learning, your brain starts dying
I – Inflammation: gum disease, high homocysteine or C-reactive protein blood levels, low omega-3 fatty acids
G – Genetics: a family member with Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia or Parkinson’s disease, or having the Apo E4 gene
H – Head trauma: a history of head injuries with or without loss of consciousness; playing contact sports (even without a concussion)
T – Toxins: alcohol or drug abuse, exposure to toxins in the environment (toxic mold, pollution) or personal products, cancer chemotherapy, etc.
M – Mental health issues: chronic stress, depression, ADD/ADHD, PTSD, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia
I – Immunity/Infection Issues – chronic fatigue syndrome, autoimmune issues, such as rheumatoid arthritis or multiple sclerosis; or untreated infections, such as Lyme disease
N – Neurohormone imbalances: low thyroid, testosterone (males and females), estrogen and progesterone (females), low DHEA (dehydroepiandrosterone), high cortisol
D – Diabesity: diabetes, pre-diabetes, and obesity
S – Sleep problems: chronic insomnia and sleep apnea

​The good news is that almost all of these risk factors are either preventable or treatable. Even the ones that aren’t, such as having a family history of dementia, can be ameliorated with the right memory rescue program.

See my brain health page for information on the memory rescue program and call for a free 30 min consultation to see if this program is right for you
Barb@barbtrailer.com